Behind the glass window

The half painted white bungalow stood quiet with wooden poles on its surface wall. Overlooking the closed glass window was a small hut with roofs made of dried coconut leaves. A toddler with a rotund face and honey brown eyes joyfully played around. How did it matter,if he lived in a bungalow or a hut. how could he even differentiate? His father's hand reached to his face, gently caressing his soft cheeks. A smile touched the child's face. His little sister stood at the half constructed gate, showing something that she had. She waved out her hand, giggling, in her old brown skirt and scattered, unkempt hair. He just dragged his little knees, not caring about the mud that scratched his skin or what people would think if he did that. He was an innocent child, who lived in his small world of joys where pride, ego, wealth failed to matter even slightly. Rather it was unknown or even non existent.
As I witnessed this, I learned something. I smiled at the little kid and walked away from the window, my heart full of happiness!

Idleness is good

It is yet another lazy sunday, after a long time. Last week I spent long hours working on my pet project, organising work with a zest to achieve things on time. Last evening, I entered saturation for the umpteenth time. Though I love work and I am passionate about it, I need different things to make me happy. Its just how I am. And sometimes this break day helps to fill some gaps and ensure I was getting back on track. It does motivate me.

Sometimes, it makes me awfully guilty that I'm idle for a day, but I brush aside those thoughts. I did all what a perfect sunday demanded from me. A great lunch, a long siesta, randomly shuttling between reading short story and life story of swami vivekananda. In the midst, the noon chirp of birds, a slight breeze that merged with the air from fan blades, the call of the flurry white cat, whimpering like a child. The honey bees cocooned in their hexagon boxes, fanning themselves with their wings, cooling under the drumstick tree, the silence of the streets, and the summery heaviness in my head.
While I was idle, I was thinking, as these words sprouted out from my soul. This idleness always leads to a creative spark in me. It does not happen when I'm working on plans and schedules, what next or when my mind is churning about when I will finish my work, my deadlines etc. Idleness is good. Not for long. But for a time when you unleash your mind with boring random thoughts. Best of all, idleness, atleast for me, helps me to slow down on life and relish things around me. It helps me craft words and prepares me for the next big thing. It keeps me going!

Hindi words in Tamil

This is a little funny, but then it has been there on my mind for a long time. Having a Bombay upbringing and living in Chennai for quite a while during my career, I have got to see both the sides and how north perceives south and viceversa. That is something I am not going to talk about here.

A few years back when I was living in Chennai, I was asking my friend if he wanted to join me for a movie?
He:Which movie?
Me: Hindi movie, Saawariya
He: What saawariya? And he started laughing! Are you going to watch a movie with such a title? And he would not stop laughing. Saawriya in Tamil means, "are you dying?"
We both ended up laughing. Finally, he never ended up coming for the movie.

Most of my friends in Chennai perpetually, in their effort to speak Tamil, made me laugh! There are many things I cannot script here!

Recently, there was a movie I saw, called Kai Po Che. In Gujarat and Mumbai, they use the word during Uttaran, the kite festival, when you defeat someone in the kite game.
In Tamil, kai po che means hand is gone. Kai means hand, poche means gone. Imagining how my Tamil friends would want to watch Kaipoche. :D

Small thrills of life, courtesy, the diverse languages we have in out country!

When work is luxury?

This morning I went down to meet a friend of mine, excited that I would be going for a bird watching trip in the evening to see a Great Horned Owlet. She said, 'You have the luxury to do it, I don't".
There are many people who think that work from home, or choosing your priorities in life is easy. It is not. I have been talking to another friend of mine J, who quit her corporate job to pursue Buddhism as a study. We always feel people are envious when we say we travel or we do something. So, here is the thing. You always have choices in life. The path we have taken is not an easy one. Everything has its own pros and cons and leaving away everything to follow our passion seems rosy to the outside world, but we have our own battles to fight.
To establish to this level, was a huge task, to be where we are, to be able to make these choices, we struggled our way through, it wasn't easy and it is not something people even think about, they only look at, yeah you travel, you go birdwatching. If you want to make that choice, no one is stopping you, but yourself. And then people talk about hundred commitments they have. Fine, I also have commitments, but I made my way through, so if you want to, do it, else stop envying, and live your own life! It is as simple as that!

When I am working from home and of course being single and no one to help me, my responsibilities increase manifold. When I am typing away, the cooker will whistle, the milk will be boiling, someone will knock at the door and yes I am a one man army. I also have to financially support myself to pay my bills. So, people who think that passionate people, lead a luxurious life, go get a life yourself!

Lessons of life

I know I dont update my blog often, but there has to be something I need to say.
Last fifteen days were chaotic like crazy. I cancelled and booked tickets, travelled, lot of meetings and finally, today a few things dawned on me yet another time after three years.

I got an opportunity recently for editing for a big corporate company. From initially, I tried to resist it and my inner voice was telling me, no! I refused to listen to it and underwent some serious learning.

So, here are a few things I learnt:
When your instinct says no, never do it. You might like doing something, but then end up wasting a lot of energy and time before you realise, its not for you! When I was discussing with my best buddies about my decision, they stood by me and said, do only things that you like and most importantly the people whom you work for should deserve you. I realised that wasn't really the case. Also, earlier, one of my colleagues had told me this. When you are not learning in a job and doing it as a chore, there is no added development and that is dangerous, so move out of your comfort zone. It did strike me today. I did NOT want it. Also, here I was carving a path for myself in environmental journalism, and where did financial editing even come in? I did not think about it then, now I do. What difference is it going to make or where is it going to take me, nowhere higher. That itself was one part of elimination process. Also, after a ten year span in the media, your ego does get hurt when someone is trying to show who he or she is, controlling you in the name of work. I did not need it now. Someone was taking my time for granted, that is something that just does not work.
I don't wait for people. I also do not make people wait and anyone who knows me can vouch for that, learnt that trait from my father who imposed punctuality as a rule more than a value.

Two, I realised, how matter how much nice people could be at the onset, it is important to give it time before you become close to anyone. I realised it in episode 2 yesterday. Learning to draw lines with people, especially with people whom you would be professionally involved in. What happens is, the person might mess your work, or intrude and make things difficult for you in such a way that you would think a hundred times before expressing something as you might offend them. So, I would keep at bay and talk only if intervention was needed.

Three, listen to your friends who know what is good for you. Anita, my pillar has been asking me to apply for a fellowship since two years and today, I have decided to go ahead. I know friends talk in the best of interest and its great to see them happy. Especially for the things they choose for you and your future.

I think I am honestly blessed to have friends who have been shock absorber in my life, who have heard me out, at different stage in life, been with me, offered me their hugs and solace. Salutes!

I somehow sense a huge freedom right now, away from the corporate cacophony, living my ideal life!!

chennai summer and people

It has been a long time since I wrote any blog post. I say this on and off because I am caught up in a world of my own, traveling and then last couple of weeks finally took respite. After running a marathon with writing and other work deadlines amidst traveling, working out, running and walking and losing three kilos, i have been on a rough yet sweet ride..

It is true though that when you are not in your home, you really know and value your home much more, which is exactly the kind of feeling i have right now. I left Coimbatore last week and came to Chennai and been dreading over for a week with the horrid evergreen summer in the city..I have been a little switched off, tired, and want to be alone, just me and myself, but then I need to be with people right now, that is the situation, but no complaints as in another week I am off to Taiwan, all alone, with no rambling phone calls, no smses and I can walk alone in the city with a feeling that no one knows me and how I love that!

I am just counting my days literally..

A life changing week?

The whole of last week was crazy and bizzare but had lot of learning in life. I met people who helped me solve a BIG problem, I met social transformers who have dedicated their life about something I can't ever imagine thinking of doing.

So here are is the thing. I have been having horrible tenants and been grappling with that issue since last three months till I completely broke up one day thinking I need to do something. I finally remembered I knew someone locally, a journalist who could help me. I called his number with no hestitation, it was rather an intuitive call. I had met this guy, R, only once before this sometime early this year on World Wetlands Day at Ukkadam Lake. We met briefly for three minutes and since we were in the same profession, he took my number. Little did I know I would call him someday, out of the blue in a panic situation.

R promised to help me immediately. He gave me a cop's number and in half an hour the cop came and everything was sorted. Sometimes I think we just stop ourselves from approaching someone and getting things sorted because we hesitate or because we want to do everything by ourselves or because we would not want to trust someone. Well, this is something I have learnt from my life, I would trust my intuition with people, even if its strangers. My travel journeys have taught me this. In places, where I have been stranded, local people have helped me, taking and accepting me as their daughters and sisters and friends and giving me the strength and support, which possibly even my family would not. And I see most urban people being judgmental about anyone. The immediate thinking is more on- this person definitely wants something from me, thats why he is helping me. Hey, urbanites, you are WRONG! Not everyone are like you, meeting and helping people only with purpose. The small town people are much more trustworthy. Anyway, sorry for the digression. The cop was super helpful and he told me not to worry, the kind of assurance which was so comforting.

So, here are the two strangers who were amazing to me! Sorted.

I have been helping P Manimaran, a boy who has been serving leprosy patients from a young age. He is more a younger brother to me now. I had written a story about him for a wellness magazine. The editor of this magazine is Niharika, who I have never seen but she is one person I can and would pick the phone and call if I am in trouble. So, we help him to organise a press meet on Mother Teresa Day on 26th. Turned out well. Apparently, the article reached out to people, who ended up funding him for his goal to build a hospital for leprosy patients. I had this tiny happiness inside me. Finally, something constructive. So, this boy says someone who read this article wanted to meet me. He was the owner of a huge chain of restaurants here in Coimbatore. I finally met him last week and we ended up talking for seven hours about people, service, family, spirituality and what not. Yesterday, I had gone to the uncle's place to meet his family and we ended up spending the whole day together. There I had an opportunity to meet a lady who was serving 160 mentally challenged kids in Niligiris area. She herself had a girl child, 18 years old, suffering from mental illness but still she was serving other kids like her. Wonder how she did that. I spent an evening listening to her very tragical life story and had tears looking at her daughter and what people go through in life. I hope I am able to be of some help to her.

Met another social worker who spent his salary for the welfare of women. He cleaned toilets to save money after he got retired and puts that money to help women who need it. These are the women who are mentally challenged. I spent some time talking to him. I cant imagine such people exist in our society. And as he says, you do not need a lot of money to do social work. You really dont. That is what people think. And every work that you do need not be associated with monetary help.

It is amazing how one person led me to connect with 5 different people and all of them working on a social cause. It has been an amazing week, with a potpourri of emotions and what not. It has also made me think about life deeply, look at the definition of problem intensely. It is not about the money, gadgets, home or any material thing you may have, it is more with the people, your attitude and if you consider yourself to be a part of a system where you are a part of this change that can alter someone's life.